Proof - Coldplay
So I waited for you
What wouldn't I do?
And I'm covered it's true
I'm covered in you
If I ever want proof
I find it in you
Yeah I honestly do
In you I find proof
Light, dark
Bright spark
Light, dark, and then light
So I waited all day
What wouldn't I say
And all the thing in you way
Things happen that way
And if I ever want proof
Then I find it in you
Yeah I honestly do
In you I find proof
Light, dark
Bright spark
Light, dark, and then light
Light, light, light... light...
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Today was the first time I heard this song and within the first chorus, I instantly stopped what I was doing and just listened.
The lyrics, the melody, the tone of Chris Martin's voice, it captivated me.
I found The Song that I would love to slow dance to at our wedding...
Yes I am jumping the gun, but we already talked about honey moon so...
Your face came to mind.
I imagined your arms around me.
Gazing into your eyes and seeing my face reflected in your beautiful blue eyes.
Lost in the melody, slowly rocking to the beat of the music.
Everyone, everything around us blurs.
It is as if time froze and it is just you and me.
Just You and Me.
Happiness.
Content.
Love.
Without the past, there is no present.
Without darkness, there is no light.
Without the lows, there is no high.
Without the pain, there is no love.
Without you, I am incomplete.
I truly believe everything in the past, as painful as it may be, all are essential lessons that help shape us into who we are today.
We learn from the pain and hope to never make the same mistake again.
The pain reminds us of what is at stake and what we have to lose.
The moment of sweetness, that overwhelming feeling of happiness is the dream we chase.
Independence feels exhilarating, the freedom to do what ever you want and not being accountable to anyone else.
However, that companionship and satisfaction derived from sharing your life with a significant other is a craving that many yearn for.
This is not to say I cannot be happy or content while I am single.
I have always known that I thrive better when I'm in a relationship.
I was loved as a child, but there seemed to always be something missing.
I grew up with a sense of loneliness and a void I wish to be filled.
Maybe it was all the TV dramas and romance novels that instilled this desire of finding my Mr Right.
The power of the media and societal pressure to create a desire of having someone to call your 'Love' and to 'live happily ever after'.
The dramatisation of the process of finding love build up unrealistic expectations of what is to come.
It seems to be about the thrill of the chase and people forget about the hurdles couples face once they confirm their "status" of being in a relationship.
Being in a long distance relationship is not something I ever thought I would even consider.
I cannot pinpoint exactly what drove my desire to get to know him.
There was a sense of open honesty and respect from and for him.
Unconsciously I started following him around and the next thing I knew, we started talking and messaging.
Maybe it is the military background, maybe it was the way he carried himself, maybe it was his accent, maybe it was just him, what ever it was, I was hooked.
I was hooked and wanting to find out more about this guy whom I have never meet in person but just felt an instant attraction and connection to.
The conversation was never ending.
I was like a child with a million questions in my mind and he was the encyclopedia that contained the answers.
We stayed up till ridiculous hours chatting.
I cherish those moments of honesty and our souls connecting both intellectually and emotionally.
You had your doubts, not about me but yourself and your history...
Remember, you said the only thing you should be selfish in is love.
You sparked something within me that I thought was gone.
In the space of less than one week you overshadow the person I have been trying to get to know for months.
I had fallen for you, your personality, your charisma, your sense of humour, your values and beliefs, simply you.
You made me be the proactive one and actually ask for contact beyond the virtual realm.
Without seeing you, I felt a strong connection I never thought I'd feel again.
There were mutual understanding, mutual desire, mutual eagerness but also fear.
You believed I would find someone better here and history would repeat itself.
Oh, if only you knew how badly I wanted to shake some sense into you.
I knew empty words would not convince you otherwise, only time will tell.
After some consideration I gave blatantly obvious "hints" to you.
Thank you for stepping up and being the man, for having the courage to ask.
The moment you said my name for the first time, my heart skipped a beat.
I never realised how special it feels to have someone utter your name.
It felt more than just someone addressing you and stating your name.
It felt like he was reaching out to my soul and asking if the Me deep down would be his girlfriend.
That moment was magical.
I was literately shaking.
The first month seemed to have passed by in a blink of the eye.
The sixteen months ahead is a daunting thought...
Please Love, let us make this work.
The sixteen months ahead is a daunting thought...
Please Love, let us make this work.
~ 16.12.16 ~
