Let Me Go

Let Me Go 

Love that once hung on the wall

Used to mean something, but now it means nothing

The echoes are gone in the hall

But I still remember, the pain of December

Oh, there isn't one thing left you could say

I'm sorry it's too late

I'm breaking free from these memories

Gotta let it go, just let it go

I've said goodbye

Set it all on fire

Gotta let it go, just let it go

You came back to find I was gone

And that place is empty,

Like the hole that was left in me

Like we were nothing at all

It's not what you meant to me

Thought we were meant to be

Oh, there isn't one thing left you could say

I'm sorry it's too late

I'm breaking free from these memories

Gotta let it go, just let it go

I've said goodbye

Set it all on fire

Gotta let it go, just let it go

I let it go and now I know

A brand new life is down this road

And when it's right, you always know

So this time I won't let go

There's only one thing left here to say

Love's never too late

I've broken free from those memories

I've let it go, I've let it go

And two goodbyes led to this new life

Don't let me go, don't let me go

Don't let me go, don't let me go, don't let me go, don't let me go

Won't let you go, don't let me go

----------------------

Changing to a new phone and giving my old phone to a person who would put it to good use.

Before I hand the phone to it's new owner, I was confronted by the task of removing traces my past off the phone.
Browsing through the photos of our life together I see the genuine smile, loving gaze and chemistry behind the lens.
Our Love was real.

While browsing, I unintentionally stumble across something that I should have expected but the news managed to take me by surprise and knock me out in one single hit.

No I have not completely let go.

These tears, this pain, the bitter taste in my mouth...

The flashback begins.
 As reality sets in the pain spreads throughout my body.

I thought I would be okay, but who am I kidding?

You overestimated my ability to move on.

You found your family and left me shattered and broken.

I am broken and cannot be mended.

It is as if while I was absentmindedly wondering down memory lane, a 12 tonne truck speed past at 100kmph and knocked me high up into the air.

Screech.

Bang.

Crack.

Silence.

You left me lying in the middle of the road bleeding while you ran off and continued on your journey.
I am the almost roadkill.
I survived, revived by medics and drugs called friends.
You continue on with your life and new family as if nothing had happened.

Even after we had ended, I never blamed you and made excuses to justify your actions while I was falling apart inside.

So many regrets, so much more I wish we could have done, so much I wish I had said to you.

I blamed myself and everything attached to me.
This pain reminds me of the cost of love.

I really love(d) you.
I was blind.

Reading that letter I wrote to you years ago brought tears to my eyes.

You may have torn the letter up and forgotten, but I still remember.

Maybe I will keep that promise I made...

You were my one and only.

You were the one I wished to spend the rest of my life with.

You were the only one I wish to marry and start a family with.

You were the one I gave my complete unconditional love and trust to.

I do not want you back nor do I wish to disturb your family.

Actions speak louder than words.

You action spoke on that fateful night 2 years ago at the petrol station when I came across that message.

What ever comes of me will be of little concern to you now.

You made your decision when you cheated emotionally.

As I hit the "reset" button on the phone, gone are the chat history, the traces of what we once were, the carrier of our past...

What remains is the memories, emotions and lessons I learnt.

You taught me the hardest lesson in life that I have yet to master.

Letting go...

~ 23.8.16 ~